Happy & Healthy relationships; The story about Fanny
Not one time have I focused on losing fat the last 6 months and still, I’ve lost 4 kg and 2% BF. Not one time these past 6 months have I stressed about losing fat. But this hasn’t been the case always. You want to know my story? Keep reading…
As I’m looking back at photos from 2008 when I went on my first “diet” I feel grateful for the experiences I gained but when we get into 2011 I feel sad. I fooled myself to believe that I looked good and that it was all a part of “bulking” which is what I was doing at the time. The truth is, I couldn’t even bring myself to actually look closer at those photos. I was embarrassed. So embarrassed that when mum insinuated that I should back off this bulking I got angry and tried to justify being fat.
For years I tried to lose fat and become “lean”. I looked at the endless photos of female fitness competitors and thought that that is what I want to look like. I had already been on stage in 2010 and loved it (I was the only one in my class, it was a beginners show) but I had heard you needed to stay on the same weight roughly for 18 months to reset your metabolism on your new weight so that was my goal. In the beginning it was easy, I could eat some shit and get away with it. I was in great shape 8 and even 10 months after my show and the amount of food I thought I could get away with slowly increased to the point where I looked like this...
What you think is Your “ideal you” is like what you think having unlimited money is like- You’ll be happy! … Finally.
Nah, it's not really like that is it?
Yes being fat or poor might trigger you to do something about your current miserable situation but reaching that “end” goal (Does an “end goal” exist anyway?? To be discussed in another post…), The "ideal you" won’t bring you endless happiness. Enjoying life here and now with fun training, diverse healthy food and nurturing your life's many relationships, will.
In my previous life (I call it my previous life because it’s so different from how I live today) I was bored. I was bored, I felt stuck in relationships, jobs, training and in the city where I lived. Before I had recognized that I was bored and my life was going down a path that I wasn’t ready for, I was fat. There is one good thing with being fat and miserable; you wake up and start doing something about it! For me that meant go travelling, move to another country to work, study and learn my profession better but it wasn’t until my life's relationships became happy and healthy that I started to see the real results.
Let me tell you what a happy and healthy relationship is to me. My relationship with training when I was focused on losing fat was detrimental; I was basically punishing myself every single time I was in the gym. The more pain I could endure the better it would be to lose fat, I thought. If I couldn’t finish or do the weight for a certain amount of set/reps I was a loser, which is what I told myself. This type of training made my self-esteem low and I had no self-respect, it was all slowly going down the drain and it was my own fault.
About a year ago I switched my training over completely to gymnastic strength and movement training after realising how tiring it has been with fat loss written on my forehead for the past 4-5 years. When I do this type of training I focus on skills that I’m yet to master and the challenge is so exciting and makes me very competitive! I feel like I’m in my element. As an old wrestler on high level in Sweden I love competing and it brings me joy to master exercises and skills that I’ve never been able to do before. Gymnastics strength and movement training builds my self-esteem and my self-respect and this is for me a happy and healthy relationship!
The more you can enjoy the ride the better reaching your goal will feel. You might even get MORE out of the journey than you thought, Like I have, I never ones thought of going into gymnastics with the fat loss agenda.
But my relationship to training wasn’t the only thing that made me the person I am today. I’ve also worked on my relationship with food for many years after dieting as a wrestler and from being a stressed out PT who barely ate or at other times stuffed my face in whipped cream and berries. I still cook from scratch but I now reach for options that has less fat (which was what I used to eat a lot of, not much nuts these days) and in general eating more vegetables, amongst other things. There's always tweaks to be made to your food depending on what's going on in your life. How to change it and when is something you learn with years of practice.
Then it’s the relationship I have with Luke. It is one particularly happy and healthy relationship that is also supportive and filled with unconditional love. That’s why I’m marring the man!! Considering these circumstances I totally get why fat loss has been a byproduct of my gymnastics training.
Looking in the back mirror I left a person with low self-esteem and low self-respect in Oslo. I’ve grown into a person with happy and healthy relationships and as a byproduct I’m now more self-confident and leaner!
Nurture your relationships and become happy and healthy <3